Before I begin, I should tell you that he'd mentioned that he told her . Have you ever met an ex's girlfriend and had a similar experience?. “As soon as your ex sees you smiling, thats the minute they want you back.” 5. “ Be the girl his ex girlfriend will hate,his mom will love, and that he will never “I love meeting my Ex's new boyfriend and thinking, 'Yep, I am. If your ex girlfriend cancels meeting you at the last moment (because of a genuine reason or a flaky one), then there's a good chance she is skeptical about this.
The key is to let yourself feel the emotions and still keep working on yourself. If you feel like crying, let it out. If you feel anger, shout out loud. But remember to always balance it out and always keep in mind that you need to become a better version of yourself if you want her back.
Occasionally, you must pick yourself up and realize that there is much more to life than relationships and breakup. You must remind yourself that life will keep throwing challenges at you. You must learn to pick yourself up and get back in the game. You need to keep moving forward.
That means you need to accept that your ex girlfriend broke up with you and your past relationship is over. You can start a new relationship with her and that relationship may be an amazing one. But the past relationship is over, and there is nothing you can do about it.
For a lot of guys reading this, the idea of accepting the breakup will be a tough one. You may even trick yourself into thinking that you have accepted the breakup when you are secretly still hoping that things will go back to the way they were. So, consider this as an optional objective for now. That means, you can move on to Stage 2 without completing this objective. But you need to finish this objective before you move on to Stage 3. Spend Time with Your Loved Ones optional One of the reasons our minds panic so hard after a breakup is because of our deep rooted fear of being alone.
What To Do If Your Ex Girlfriend Ignores Or Avoids You On Purpose
Of being left out in the world. Of never being loved. But chances are, you have a lot of people in your life that love you, care about you, and want you to be happy.
Your friends and family can be a very effective healing tool. When you spend time with them and notice how they care about you and love you, your sub-conscious mind will calm down realizing that you are not alone in this world. That you are loved, and you will survive even if you have lost your ex.
You can still get your ex girlfriend back. But you must make a note in your mind to make new friends, good friends you can trust, when you are ready in the future. I have seen this happen to my readers and clients over and over again. And I would hate to see it happen to you. The Inner Demons aka focus on yourself Objectives: In my opinion, this is the most important stage of this mission.
If you fail at this stage, you will most likely fail at getting your ex girlfriend back permanently. Even if you somehow manage to get her back for the time being, I am quite positive you will break up again in the future. We are going to go through each of the objectives of this stage and then we are going to list out some of the common pitfalls that most guys face during this stage.
I am going to try to list out some of the most common reasons here that you may be able to relate to. Here are a few examples of when a girl loses attraction for you.
You always showered her with affection. You gave her whatever she wanted. In fact, all the three reasons mentioned above are a direct result of insecurity. If you love her, you should show her. For me, there is nothing more joyful than making my girlfriend happy and laugh with joy.
But most guys who end up being dumped are not genuine in showing affection. And slowly, she is going to realize that you are not doing it because you mean it.
But because you sub consciously want something in return. You Gave her Whatever She Wanted Again, giving your ex-girlfriend what she wants is not really a deal breaker. For example, suppose you are having an argument about you always trying to control her. And instead of trying to understand her, you go out and buy her a necklace that she wanted for a while. She is excited and forgets about the argument. You avoided a serious issue in the relationship. You avoided a serious issue in yourself.
And that festered inside her. If you want to give something your ex-girlfriend, do it out of your heart and do it because you want to do it without getting anything in return. Guys who are insecure, controlling and secretly manipulative are always trying to control the situation by giving their girlfriend something and hoping to get something in return.
This creates an unhealthy pattern in the relationship and their girlfriends end up losing attraction for them. Insecurity, jealousy, control and manipulation are present in almost every unhealthy relationship. As you are going through this stage, I want you to think back and figure out when you did something for your ex girlfriend that had an ulterior motive behind it.
Did you buy her gifts because you were afraid she was going to leave you? Did you avoid a serious issue by showering her with affection? Did you act controlling because you were afraid she will fall for some other guy? Did you call her names when arguing because you wanted her to feel ashamed about something?
If you are just reading this article a few days after your breakup, it might be a bit too much for you to think all this through right now. So, you might want to bookmark this article and come back to it at a later stage when you have calmed down and can think rationally. You can make your ex girlfriend attracted to you again easily once you learn how to fix the deep rooted insecurity that pushed her away.
We will talk about this in the next section when we talk about becoming more confident. She Does not See a Future with You and She Lost Connection A lot of times, your ex-girlfriend may have broken up with you because she does not feel a connection with you anymore.
This is usually the case when you were together for a very long time more than a year. If she does not feel a connection with you, she will leave you because she does not see a future with you.
She might still be attracted to you. She might still feel that you are a confident attractive guy. She just thinks that you are both not compatible. An emotional connection can be lost for the following reasons.
You and your ex-girlfriend lost the spark. You neglected her for too long and took her for granted. You had too much fights and disagreements. Your life goals do not align with each other. All the above reasons are self-explanatory, so I am not going to go in detail.What NOT to Do When Meeting Your Ex
For example, If you neglected her, you will want to tell her that you will spend more time with her if she gives you another chance. If you and her both wanted different things in life, you will want to tell her that you will compromise and give her whatever she wanted marriage, kids etc.
The fact is, your ex girlfriend does not feel a connection with you anymore. And if she does not feel a connection with you, then it will not matter to her what you are willing to do for her.
Before you can show her how things have changed, you first need to rebuild attraction and connection with her. We will get into that in stage 4 of this article. These may include You cheated on her You were abusive to her verbally or physically You betrayed her trust in some way monetary or emotional cheating How to get her back if you cheated on her, or did something to hurt her? The key to winning your ex-girlfriend back in this situation is to show her a ray of hope before anything else.
And the best way to show her a ray of hope is to accept where you screwed up, figure out why you did it and work on understanding yourself. So, work on understanding yourself and learn to trust yourself. Getting therapy or joining a support group sex addicts, alcohol anonymous, anger management etc. This will show her you are serious about change and it will give her a ray of hope that things may be different in the future. Get your ex back after you cheated. Long Distance Relationship Long distance relationships are a tough one.
If you and your ex girlfriend broke up because of long distance, then you are in for an uphill battle. Long Distance often causes a couple to lose attraction, lose connection or betray of trust.
I love her, and she is one in a million. This is why I have included this task in stage 2 of this mission. Once you have accepted the breakup and have gone through grief after a breakup, you will need to figure out whether she is worth it. Here is one article that will help you do that. And read below for some actionable tips about this.
Write down 3 things about your ex that need to change for you to have a healthy and happy relationship with her. For example, She needs to be better at communicating or She needs to stop flirting with other guys Note: Become A Better Version of Yourself What happened in your past relationship with your ex-girlfriend is past.
Because YOU are going to be a better version of yourself. In fact, the insecurity that pushed your ex away and caused her to break up with you is the result of years of negative feedback you received from the world and yourself. And if you fake it, your ex girlfriend will eventually see through it and start thinking of you as manipulative. Thankfully, you have enough time to work on your confidence during the no contact period. So check back on this space later to figure out how to rebuild confidence during no contact.
Or if you both argued constantly and could never come to a reasonable conclusion. One of the most important relationship skills you can learn is proper communication.
If you can be a pro at handling conflict with your girlfriend, each fight you have will bring you closer together. If you learn to empathize and understand her on a deep level, the connection she will feel with you will be unparalleled. So, work on these two skills as they are very important in not only getting her back, but keeping her forever. Your ex girlfriend was physically attractive to you at one point of time.
So, she will be attracted to you again. Working on your physical appearance does have a few advantages though. You will feel more confident.
Getting a fresh look will give the impression that you are a new person. Working out will release endorphins that will make you feel happier. But it sure helps. If you spend time with your friends and other girls, you will feel better about yourself and realize other girls are interested in you as well. Speak to them and let them know that you find them attractive with confidence. Go out with your friends at least on two weekends. Go out for a road trip or a vacation with your friends.
But it can have a huge effect on your happiness, your confidence, your well-being and your relationships. Needless to say, it helps you become a better version of yourself and will increase your chances of getting your ex girlfriend back. Actionable Tips Important Meditate for at least 10 minutes for 21 days continuously. If you are working on something you care about, your mind will focus on only that and you will forget about everything else.
Moreover, working on things that you care about will give you something to speak with your ex when you end no contact. Guys who are passionate about things other than their girlfriends are instantly seen as more confident and less insecure. Actionable Tips Important Figure out one hobby, career goal or life goal that you are interested in or passionate about.
It should be something that you can get better at and eventually become an expert at. Something that you can become the best in your town at if you work hard enough or long enough. Spend at least 10 hours a week working on it. The reason is simple, the no contact period is more about you and less about your ex girlfriend.
Getting her to miss you will help you in the short term but is not very effective over the long term. If you sacrifice your priorities because you are trying to get her to miss you, you will suffer in the long run. Getting her to miss you is a nice side effect you can achieve by putting in a little more effort.
More than that will make her think that you are just doing it to manipulate her. Post a maximum of 5 positive thinking and self-improvement posts on social media.
Add 7 new girls as your friend on Facebook. Obsessing over her in an effort to get your ex girlfriend to miss you A lot of times, guys start obsessing over whether or not their ex girlfriend misses them.
Does she miss me? She posted a snapchat story about a toy that I gave her, is she thinking about me? Does she still love me? I posted a status and she liked it, does it mean she is over me? If you try to play this game of social media jealousy with her, you will lose.
How To Win Her Back in 5 Stages - Game Plan [with 17 Mini-Objectives]
If you find yourself obsessing over this, do not do anything to make your ex miss you. Instead, just stay away from social media altogether during no contact. The truth is, everyone can and should strive to improve themselves and become a better version of yourself.
Get Her to speak to you again normally. Get her to smile or laugh at something you said at least once. This stage is called the dragon of resistance because there is a big dragon which is guarding her from opening up to you and giving you a chance to rebuild attraction. This is no doubt the toughest battle in this mission. Most guys end up failing at this stage. The resistance she has is based on the following assumptions.
My ex will try to manipulate me and do anything just to get me back. He will try to act casual even if he is miserable inside. He will try to get me to meet with him so he can beg or plead. He has not really changed and neither have I, and if I get back with him, things will go back to the way they were.
These are all very valid reasons to not speak to you. In fact, if any of that is true, I would not advise your ex gf to reply to you if you contacted her.
But hopefully, we have taken care of this in Stage 1 and Stage 2 of getting her back. By now, you are a better version of yourself. You are more confident and you are sure that things will be different when you both get back together.
In this stage, your goal is just to address the first three assumptions that your ex-girlfriend has. You can show her how things will be different later when you are speaking to each other regularly. If you mess up here, your ex girlfriend will put up her defenses instantly and you will have to do no contact again for a month or two before trying again.
How to Act Around Your Ex: 10 Steps (with Pictures) - wikiHow
Get Her to Speak to you Normally There can be two scenarios in this case. Either you and your ex left on good terms. So, it could be possible that your ex girlfriend is ready to move on from you entirely and that is why she is ignoring or avoiding you. Yep, I even failed at this during my very first breakup. What To Do If Your Ex Girlfriend Is Ignoring Or Avoiding You Now that we understand the main reasons for why your ex girlfriend may ignore you lets shift our focus to what you need to be doing to prevent that from happening.
Here is a quick peek at those steps, Step One- Flip The Script With No Contact Step Two- Successfully Make Contact With Your Ex Post NC Now, before I move on I do want to state that the purpose of this entire article is to simply take you from this point, To this point, In other words, if you follow the advice laid out on this page you will most likely move from your ex girlfriend ignoring you to her not ignoring you.
However, if you want her back in your life permanently there is a lot more you have to do than to just regain her attention. Ok, now that we have that out of the way lets take a look at how the three steps above can help you regain your exes attention.
I have been through my fair share of experiences in which someone I really care for ignored me on purpose and let me tell you it is a very disheartening feeling. Seriously, there are moments where you just want to scream at the top of your lungs at how unfair your love life is.
I have a fun question for you. What do you think happens to most men when an ex girlfriend they really want to talk to ignores them on purpose? They become super desperate and turn into those calling and texting terrorists that I mentioned above. Women kind of get a kick out of it too when a man does this. I am always telling the women over on my other site, Ex Boyfriend Recovery, that men are the ones that crave admiration but the truth is that human beings in general love to feel admired and the last time I checked human beings also included women.
I mean, ask any woman what she would like more, Option A- A man who makes her feel loved and admired? Pretty much all women are going to say that they prefer option A. And therein lies the point. An underlying reason that your ex girlfriend could potentially be ignoring you is that she knows it will illicit a reaction from you.
She understands that no one likes being ignored and that you may be upset and go crazy. She is hoping that it will draw out that admiration and love that she so desperately wants.
She initiated it citing that you really never show any emotion towards her anymore.
How To Get Your Ex Girlfriend Back By LEVELING UP – Game Plan in 5 Stages (And 17 Missions)
So, as the days pass you keep trying to text and call her. Unfortunately for you she is completely ignoring you. How do you overcome this? So, she decided that it would be a good idea to ignore him while she was at work. Now, my friend who worked from home was absolutely furious that he decided to one up her by not being there when she showed up at home. In his mind she would come home, feel horrible about the whole situation and apologize profusely to him. He told me he spent the whole day just going out and having fun.
He treated himself to a man day so to speak. He went to the movies, ate at a nice restaurant and by the end of the day, when he felt enough time had passed, he decided to come home. Now, my buddy knew his girlfriend usually got home at 5: What happened next in the story made quite the impression on me. As a result, my buddy ended up apologizing to HER. You see, my buddy was sure that when he came home he was going to teach his girlfriend a lesson and she was going to apologize to him.
I Instead, it was him who got the lesson. Your situation with your ex girlfriend is probably a lot like that. Your ex is trying to teach you a lesson by ignoring you so she is going to have a similar expectation that my friend had about his girlfriend.
So, if you can overcome that expectation and do the opposite of what she is expecting all of a sudden it will be her who starts to rethink things and realize the mistake she has made. What your ex girlfriend is doing to you right now, ignoring you. Well, it is essentially doing that to her for a specific period of time. I recommend the 21 day no contact rule for general situations.
However, if you want more advice on what length of time you should use when you implement the no contact rule I recommend reading my book or checking out this article. Step Two- Successfully Make Contact With Your Ex Girlfriend Post NC If you are successful in your attempt to turn the tables on your ex girlfriend then congratulations, you have completed the first step of the process.
Step one turning the tables on your ex was all about putting her in a frame of mind where she is wanting to hear for you or wanting to message you. Step two is all about successfully making contact with your ex girlfriend. Well, if you have read this far down on the page then I am assuming that your ex girlfriend is currently ignoring or avoiding you. This is why step one turning the tables on her is so essential. It basically primes her so that she is looking forward to your text messages or phone calls.
In other words, Step two cannot successfully occur unless step one is completed. As for reaching out to her… The Correct Way To Reach Out To Your Ex Girlfriend Once you feel you have your ex girlfriend properly primed or looking forward to hearing from you step one you can go ahead and reach out to her to test and see if she is going to ignore you anymore.
Now, this brings up a very interesting question. What is the correct way to reach out to your ex girlfriend? Some will swear by a well timed phone call. Others think its a good idea to write a note.
I am actually not a big fan of any of those methods right off the bat. Is there a time and a place for them down the road?